Hello!
I’m Monica Scalf, wife, mom, business owner, writer and endlessly curious human.
Have you ever been in a rut even though you have a thousand things to be grateful for?
I have.
About a dozen years ago, my stress and worry skyrocketed even though I had everything I needed to have an amazing life – a great husband, two awesome kids, a nice home, and a job as a part-time English professor.
I should have been riding a happiness wave, but most of the time I felt caught in a tsunami of overwhelm. And worse, I would beat myself up for feeling this way because I had so much to be grateful for. It was confusing and exhausting, and definitely not a fun way to go through life.
Luckily, I accidentally discovered the root of my problem while teaching a brainstorming activity to my freshmen composition class. The instructions were simple - put the word JOY in the center of a piece of paper and draw ten circles around it; fill in each circle with something that is guaranteed to bring you joy.
I put my own “Joy Map” on the whiteboard and had it filled out in no time.
I felt pretty impressed with myself as I walked to the other side of the room to wait for students to finish. But when I turned back toward the whiteboard and really saw the things I had written, I thought to myself, “Who are you kidding? You don’t do any of those things anymore!”
It was true, and in a flash I realized I had unknowingly replaced my joy and happiness with things like fear, anxiety, obligation, worry, and negativity. No wonder I was so stressed out and overwhelmed all of the time!
I decided on the drive home that I had finally had enough of my negative emotions. Like houseguests who had overstayed their welcome, it was time for me to kick them out.
I began researching stress management, brain science, mindfulness, personal development, positive psychology and more. I even took an online course to become a certified stress management coach.
Over time and with a lot of experimentation, I came up with the right mix of daily practices, habit changes, and thought patterns that helped me kick my negativity to the curb.
Since then, I have a much easier time staying on the bright side of life. I can deal with bad days more quickly and avoid the negative thinking spiral that I used to get sucked into. I not only have more joy and happiness in my life, but everything is better – my relationships, my mental health, my physical health, and even my career.
After learning so much about how to improve daily life, I started my own company called The Work Well Group where I help leaders create more positive and productive workplaces.
Even though my life is much brighter than it was when I was teaching that day, I know how easy it is to slip into feeling stuck and defeated. The resources on this site are designed to help you stay out of that rut - to help you work and live well. I hope you find it useful!